Punk Site Poetry With Cherry B: The Vegan Who Came For Tea

Our punked up pumped up performance poet, who has been described as the The Punk Pam Ayers and The Cockney Cooper Clarke, has returned with The Vegan Who Came For Tea, her latest exclusive poem for The Punk Site. Cherry B straddles the Shakespeare themes of comedy and tragedy, teasing with laughter, then taunting those undesirables in society. One half of the unique Cherry & Peesh, who have embellished the punk ‘n folk scene with melodical tales and catchy tunes for the past four years. Travelling all over the country, performing at prestige gigs and festivals. Author, writer, poet, psychotherapist, professional swearer, dyspraxic and opinionated, words that define and illuminate qualities that feature within the personality of Cherry B.

“This poem is an updated version of the classic kids book from our childhood, which has recently come under scrutiny for stereotyping gender roles. Being a vegan myself, I can see both sides of the argument, where people are stuck and lack imagination or who are scared to change. Rudeness can often never encourage change, but Sophie’s optimism became a positive way in.” (Cherry B)

Sophie and her mama were just sitting down to tea

Then a knock at the door, mama said “that’s pissing off me”.

“its not Amazon, I’ve not ordered anything, 

it can’t be the loan sharks, I’ve already pawned my ring.

It won’t be your father, he don’t live here anymore”

Sophie ran and swiftly, opened up the door.

In came a hand with a rainbow mitten,

Said “hi I’m your neighbour, d’ya have any milk for my kitten?”

Sophie said “it’s a tiger, please come in

With your stripy kitten you must bring”.

Mama shouted angrily ‘we’re having our tea’

Neighbour replied ‘ooh thanks for having me’

Mama glared at the visitor but she laid out a plate.

“I’m your new neighbour and my name is Kate”.

“do you have some milk, my kitten needs a drink”

Mama was cursing from the kitchen sink.

She turned and smiled, kitten ran round her legs

“Sit and have your tea it’s sausage chips and eggs”.

Kate looked insulted, “I certainly can’t eat that

I won’t even buy, cows milk for my cat”.

“I’m a vegan and I’m offended by your offer

If I’d known you’d be like this, I wouldn’t even bother”. 

Mama now was tiring of this very troublesome guest

So she retorted with sarcasm off her frustrated chest.

She slammed down her oven mitt “So what exactly will you eat? 

I don’t cater for fussiness, all I have is dairy or meat”.

“Would you like some weekabix served with a tin of beans?

Or poncy grains from Waitrose no fucker knows what it means!

How about a scrubbing brush drizzled with olive oil?

Or is there some water I can put on the boil”?

“Don’t be so rude to me, I’m trying to save this planet

From arrogant selfish carnivores who eat like a ganet.

There is an assumption that we are hippies freaks 

But we are offering change, but it’s money that speaks.

Please don’t be offended when I refuse to eat your food.

It’s the way we treat our animals that is careless and rude.

I could show you pictures of cruelty that is true

But your ignorance will divert from anything you chew.

So I’m sorry that I came round, I didn’t mean to cause some friction

I’ll just take my opinions and share my valediction”.

Sophie had been listening and taking this on board

“Mummy being a vegan needs to be explored”.

“I don’t want to eat animals they are friends to me,

Mummy please can we have a tiger round for tea”?

Cherry B‘s collection of poetry and lyrics, Job Lot Of Rhymes, is now available via Flapjack Press. Job Lot Of Rhymes spans three decades of Cherry B’s performance work. Political, societal and inclusive, it is uncompromising and passionate punk ’n roll poetics firing from the belly of social conscience. Cherry B also appears on her monthly radio show on Totally Wired Radio, Poetry Is The New Rock ’N Roll, that offers an hour of lyric led, spoken versed, genre smashing, musical adventure into the exploration of hidden poetry, that is often camouflaged behind powerful rhythms and riffs. Named after one of their own songs, Cherry & Peesh will travel through the decades and diverse styles to discuss and dissect the meaning of rhyme as reflected by songwriters. The next Poetry Is The New Rock ’N Roll is on the 28th November at 9pm and you can stream the October edition via Mixcloud