Radagun – Life Lessons

Female fronted pop-punk band Radagun have titled their new album Life Lessons, and while the band certainly explores choices, a more suitable title might have been High School Teen Drama Guide.  The entire affair comes across as a bubbly greatest hits survey of every poorly founded, unsubstantiated relationship decision in history.  In short, this is what Paramore would have ended up like had they never developed a quick wit and underlying intelligence.

Compounding matters, lead vocalist Aimee Ortiz sounds incredibly obnoxious given the lyrical content.  The bulk of these songs are written from the perspective of a flaky, indecisive teen girl who really doesn’t know what she wants, in the process screwing with everyone’s emotions.  You know those high school girls known for leading on boys only to dump them three weeks later and then drag out the breakup into some twisted, year-long drama production?  In a nutshell, that’s Life Lessons.  There’s no sense of actual learning, and the same bad choices get harked upon track after track.

For starters, the album opens with “Not The One,” an obnoxious tune about a persistent boy who’s only crime is being “too nice” for our young protagonist.  Time and again Ortiz sings, “When we hang out it’s just for fun,” “we’re just good friends, get it through your head,” and “I don’t like you that way.”  Now granted everyone is entitled to their preferences, but when two tracks later Ortiz sings about a cheat who takes the protagonist for granted, and that she “deserves more,” her inability to value what’s right in front oh her is infuriating.  To make matters worse, on the next track, “It Never Ends,” this fictitious female starts whining about what is no doubt a stable relationship and how she’s “bored of being with him” once a few guy comes on the scene.  But the real deal breaker comes on the next track (yes, it’s all really just that sequential), “Lie To Me.”  Here she goes on about a jumbled mess of post-breakup feelings, at first coming to the realization that “it’s really over;” then asking if this guy still thinks about her despite having moved on; and then finally coming up with one of the worst thought processes of all time with the passage “even though I left you I never thought you’d leave me.”  Pardon my bluntness, but what a bitch.

Moving on (I could dwell for pages), musically Life Lessons is quite tolerable albeit rather generic.  As previously mentioned, the group comes across as a watered down version of Paramore.  However, there are a couple of minor deviations from place to place.  For example, “Panic” and “From Now” feature some brief cello and bell arrangements, although they really only come across as understated nods to Panic! at the Disco.

But as listenable as Life Lessons is, the lyrics really hinder the experience.  Our protagonist demonstrates very little emotional growth, and it’s easier to hate than sympathize with her.  The whole encounter feels like watching a shallow teen movie with the benefit of foresight and common sense: it’s absolutely infuriating.